Category Archives: Off Topic

Trump’s Appearance In a Porn Surfaces Amidst Miss Universe Controversy 

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Remember that time Donald Trump slut shamed Miss Universe by telling everyone they should go check out her sex tape? Well, the Republican presidential nominee just put his foot in his mouth. Again. It seems Trump forgot about that time he made an appearance in a Playboy adult film.

“Trump’s role in the porn is relatively benign and centers around him breaking a bottle of champagne on a Playboy-branded limo while several of the playmates are visiting New York City,” reported Buzzfeed, who found the sex tape in New York–based adult video store Cinema Cornucopia. “Other scenes from the film feature fully nude women posing in sexual positions, dancing naked, touching themselves while naked, touching each other sensually, rubbing honey on themselves, taking a bath, and dressing in costumes.” Surely Trump’s heard the saying “Keep your own doorstep clean”? Perhaps he needs to apply that proverb to his career in dirty adult films!

Looking for some adult fun yourself? We’ll give you an experience you’ll never forget!

Check out more about Trump’s appearance in a porn movie here: https://www.politicususa.com/2016/09/30/trump-3.html

Durex Played Us With Its Eggplant Condom Hoax

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eggplant3-0While food can be an aphrodisiac, and the eggplant emoji is everyone’s favorite sexual innuendo, we’re pretty sure not many people would find eggplant erotic. At least not when it comes to flavored condoms. This is why Durex’s recent eggplant-flavored condom hoax was so genius.

When Durex tweeted “#BreakingNews: We’re launching an exciting new savoury#condom range – Eggplant flavour! #CondomEmoji,” most people were just confused. But some people were quick to call Durex’s bluff, figuring the condom company couldn’t possibly be ridiculous and impractical enough to think people want their junk to taste like veggies. Durex admitted to the ruse, tweeting that since everyone loves a good sexual emoji, why not have an actual condom emoji? Good point, Durex—and well played.


Looking for something naughty yourself? Whether or not you like eggplant, we’ve got just the thing to make you smile!

Check out more about Durex’s eggplant-flavored condom joke: https://mashable.com/2016/09/05/eggplant-flavoured-condoms/#sE0k5yGaMSqi

8 Innocent Photos That Are Actually Totally Filthy 

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Sometimes when you see seemingly “innocent” looking things, you wonder if they’re actually innocent or if it’s just your dirty mind. You know, like with that supposedly PG-13 bumper sticker that reads “BJ Mom.” Well, we’ve got good news for you: while you may have a dirty mind, those so-called innocent things are actually totally filthy. Here are 8 photos that prove it (check them out below).

  • Shadow Dicks
    In this picture, the shadows from the bridge appear to be in the shape of a dick. Architecture is so cool!
Image Source: CanYouActually.com

Image Source: CanYouActually.com

  • Vagina rock
    Yeah, we’d be willing to bet everybody has seen at least one pussy in a rock formation. Mother nature, represent!
Image Source: CcanYouActually.com

Image Source: CcanYouActually.com

  • Elmo Experiments
    We know what this seemingly innocent children’s book is really about…
Image Source: Radass

Image Source: Radass

  • “Insert fingers and tear along perforations”
    We’ve all seen this on a box—and we’ve all thought the same dirty thing!
Image Source: Men's Den

Image Source: Men’s Den

  • P_ _ I S
    Oh, Wheel of Fortune. We definitely do know the answer to “Where To Find Love.”
Image Source: Men's Den

Image Source: Men’s Den

  • In the Pink: Latex Gloves
    Found right in your local grocery store…filthy!
Image Source: Radass

Image Source: Radass

  1. “BJ Mom”
    MILF and proud!
Image Source: Distractify

Image Source: Distractify

  • “It’s amazing what you can do with two fingers and a thumb.”
    It certainly is.
Image Source: Distractify

Image Source: Distractify

Want to put that dirty mind to good use? There’s nothing ambiguous about the filthy stuff you’ll find here!

Check out more innocent photos that are actually filthy here: https://distractify.com/humor/2016/08/20/35-innocent-photos-somehow-completely-filthy

You Can Now Get a Dick In Your Latte

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Uncensored Image from Instagram User: @dicklatte

Uncensored Image from Instagram User: @dicklatte

If you’re a latte drinker, you probably already know that the latte art obsession has officially peaked. These days, it’s no longer hip to get your coffee decorated with a carefully crafted kitty or flower design. Instead, dick lattes are the new hot thing. Because, really, who doesn’t want a dick first thing in the morning to start their day off right?

“The next time you get your cup of joe, take a second look before you put the lid on, you might find yourself face to face with a beautiful penis crafted from foam,” reports Your Tango. And in case you’re dying to see these dick java masterpieces, obviously the internet has you covered (see dick pics below). There’s one with spiky balls and a veiny shaft that ejaculates adorable fluffy hearts. Another coffee-cock resides peacefully among a soft meadow of flowers. Coffee fiend or no, it’s too bad dicks don’t actually shoot cute hearts and flowers!

A photo posted by @dicklatte on

A photo posted by @dicklatte on

A photo posted by @dicklatte on

A photo posted by @dicklatte on


Looking for a little pick me up yourself? We’ve got everything you need to get your day started right!

Check out more about dick lattes here: https://www.yourtango.com/2016293361/best-dick-latte-pictures-penis-art-coffee

You’ve Never Seen Anything Like This Artist’s Erotic, Surreal Tumblr

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NSFW Girls UnawareA Hamburg-based male artist, who chooses to remain anonymous, is behind the fantastical freakiness Girls Unawares, the Tumblr that remixes body parts into monstrous creations. The Tumblr is both an erotic celebration and a radical project in the name of self-love and acceptance. “Sure, masturbate or let someone you love choke you. Your body hair, stretch marks and freckles are beautiful!” says the artist.

He uses clay to make such works as an erect cock in a priest’s robe, arms wide open like Christ the Redeemer. You’ll also find bright, candy-striped toothpaste neatly being squeezed out of an anus and onto a toothbrush! Other uncanny creations include a pussy with cat whiskers, a cigarette-smoking vayjayjay, and a butthole serving up frozen yogurt! The artist takes cues from the generation of virtual activists and creatives he finds on Tumblr, who reject white-washed images of “artificially beautified bodies” and instead go for “radical acceptance”: “They use BDSM as their playground or just as a fashion statement. And most importantly, they want to decide for themselves about their bodies and their sexuality.” Nothing weird about that!

Want to have some fantastically freaky experiences yourself? Let’s get weird and wild!

Check out the erotic, surreal works of Girls Unawares: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/artist-will-turn-your-tumblr-profile-into-a-freaky-nsfw-surrealist-masterpiece_us_57588a79e4b00f97fba73231

GlowFYourself Sells the Most Innovative Butt Plugs Around—on Etsy

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iusa_400x400.36145780_sh3yEtsy is home to some of the craftiest and best DIY goods on the internet—or anywhere! So it (sort of?) makes sense that the online crafts store now also sells some of the world’s most innovative hand-crafted butt plugs! GlowFYourself is a treasure trove of creative, quirky, and multi-use sex toys. They delight the senses and offer consumers the holy trinity of dildo/vibrator/butt plug all in one toy. Not only that, but they also have other uses as well, such as the popular USB butt plug. There’s even a beer pong butt plug!

“We’ve recently put together some brand new stuff such as the Booty Pop, which is a reusable Popsicle mold/butt plug and the Booty Binky,” says Portland-based artist and founder of GlowFYourself, Jesse Lindsay. His provocative sex toys are truly one of a kind, and he’s always churning out new products that raise the butt plug bar. He’s currently at work on a GPS butt plug, and a Swiss army knife butt plug, which he won’t sell until it’s 100% safe and usable. Sadly, he’s retired the infamous light saber dildo, but fear not: “it’s dangerous to go alone, and I’m always down to weaponize and light up some sex toys!”

Looking for a treasure trove of sexy innovation? Come get creative with us!

Check out more about GlowFYourself’s amazing, multi-use butt plugs here!

Thoughts Everyone Has Had During Sex

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Does this sex thought sound familiar?: “Does my moaning sound weird?” What about this: “Calm down, you’re gonna break my dick!” In Buzzfeed’s latest video, all of the strange, random, worried thoughts you’ve probably had during sex at one time or another are verbalized—one humping person at a time. Here are some highlights (check out the video below).

First up, the worried thoughts: “Am I too loud?”; “Are my roommates home?”; “Can my neighbors see though my blinds?” Then it’s on to the hopes: “I hope he doesn’t expect me to talk dirty”; “I have to fart—I hope it’s silent…”; “I hope I don’t pee on you.” There’s even a “pets” category: “I wish that cat would stop staring at me.” And of course, there’s regrets: “Oooh. Fuck—I just thought about my ex!” Finally, we end on curiosity: “I wonder how many calories I’m burning?”; “I wonder what my O face looks like?”; “Do we cuddle now?”

Wondering how you stack up in the sack? Fear not—there’s no cats or nosey neighbors here!

Check out more thoughts everyone has had during sex: https://www.buzzfeed.com/kanediep/31-things-that-cross-everyones-mind-during-sex?utm_term=.es94LmDEGJ#.yyMknE6aJ4

8 People Confessed the Strangest Things They’ve Said During Orgasm

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As anyone who’s ever yelled something outrageous while cumming understands, it’s impossible to be self-possessed during an orgasm. Whether it’s calling out your ex’s name or something totally strange, you’ve probably said some less-than-ideal things while climaxing. Here are some strange things people said during orgasm on Whisper.

  1. “I screamed out that I wanted to be a woman during sex with my wife last night….”
    The mind has a mind of its own during orgasm!
  2. “When he was about to orgasm, he screamed ‘Yes Brittany!’ at the top of his lungs. My name’s not Brittany. That’s his sister. FML.”
    Freudian slip?
  3. “I didn’t realize how much I loved learning about communism until I screamed out Josef Stalin during orgasm.”
    This guy gives new meaning to the term “history buff!”
  4. “My boyfriend yelled, ‘For Narnia!’, once when we were having sex.”
    Well, sex can make you feel like a warrior!
  5. “My girlfriend and I were having sex last night. She screamed out her own name…”
    That’s one way to toot your own horn!
  6. “One time I was thinking about cereal during sex and screamed out Cap’n Crunch as I came.”
    The Cap’n makes it happen!
  7. “He lasted 2 minutes, yelled ‘I won!’ as he finished and then fell asleep.”
    Definitely doesn’t sounds like a winner to us…
  8. “My ex asked me to call him Santa Claus during sex. I screamed ‘Fuck me Santa!’”
    And a VERY merry Christmas to you!

Looking to have an outrageous experience yourself? We can make you yell about stranger stuff than cereal here!

h/t: Distractify

The Dildo Selfie Stick Will Capture All Your Most Exciting Moments

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Screenshot via YouTube.com | dildoeverything

These days, many people are all too eager to share every detail of their lives on social media. So it makes sense that the next step in the selfie movement would be even more, er, intimate. Introducing the Dildo Selfie Stick – a bog-standard selfie stick with a sex toy stuck on the end!

“What if you could capture one of life’s greatest moments with the push of a button?” asks a dead-pan woman in the promotional ad. “It’s the first selfie stick where you can actually, well, stick it.” If you’ve been dying to share what you look like cumming, the dildo selfie stick is the perfect sex toy for you. “At the moment of climax, the user presses the button to snap a pic of their O face,” the woman explains. You can even switch out your sex toys at the end of the stick to add some spice to your selfies!

Unfortunately for all you exhibitionist/selfie fans, the product’s a joke. But we could see how a product that lets you “stick it up your….” and then share the moment with the entire internet would be real.

Want to experience one of life’s greatest moments? You don’t need a selfie stick to get your O face on!

Check out more about the Dildo Selfie Stick here or watch the video below:

9 Hilarious Tweets About Masturbating

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Image Source: Flickr.com | User: rccola159When it comes to cracking jokes about jerking off, you just have to give a hand (see what we did there?) to these witty people writing hilarious tweets about masturbating. As one Twitter user says, masturbation is really just a “VERY poorly attended orgy.” Here are 9 hilarious tweets about masturbating.

  1. “Good term for masturbation I just thought of – Jackin’ the peen stalk”
    Gotta climb to the top of the peen stalk and wrestle the one-eyed ogre to get that golden goose!
  2. “My caught masturbating face is exactly the same as my caught jamming out to NSYNC face because they’re simultaneous.”
    We don’t know, the latter might be more embarrassing…
  3. “Who called it “Masturbation tips for women” rather than ‘Dildos and Dildon’ts’.”
    It’s funny cause it’s true!
  4. “If there’s a sock on my doorknob it means I’m having sex with the other one.”
    Make sure you knock before entering!
  5. “If these walls could talk I’d almost certainly masturbate less.”
    Good thing they can’t—no reason to stop jerkin’ it!
  6. “Do guys have a go to masturbation sock like I do with shoesHAHAHA I’M KIDDING! I would never! I’m a lady.

    It’s an adorable strappy sandal.”
    Talk about a foot fetish!
  7. “The first rule of masturbation club is to come alone.#NationalMasturbationDay”
    The second rule of masturbation club: You do not talk about masturbation club—unless you’re cracking jokes about it on Twitter!
  8. “Is ‘toot my own horn’ a euphemism for masturbating yet?”
    It is now!
  9. “My friends gave me a bunch of sex toys for my birthday as a ‘joke.’ I can’t stop laughing*

    *masturbating”
    The gift that keeps on giving, er, receiving?

Looking to find some good lovin’ without the aid of a sock? We don’t mean to toot our own horn, but a NiteFlirt party is SO much better than a party of one!

Check out more hilarious tweets about masturbating here: https://www.buzzfeed.com/jasminnahar/tweets-about-masturbating-that-are-just-really-really-fun#.iaDVgWbqox