Anti-Sex Beds Arrive At Paris Olympics

The City of Love is doing all it can to keep lovemaking out of the Olympics. “Anti-sex” beds have arrived in Paris ahead of the 2024 Olympic Games, with their materials and small size allegedly aimed at deterring athletes from getting kinky during the competition. Over the years, stories about wild sex occurring among Olympic athletes have abounded: table tennis player Matthew Syed previously said that he had a debaucherous time at the 1992 games in Barcelona, Spain, saying: “I got laid more often in those two and a half weeks than in the rest of my life.”

At the 2012 games in London, one anonymous athlete admitted to having a foursome with a male teammate and two women at the Olympic Village. It’s unlikely cardboard beds will stop the horny Olympians from fucking—with one competitor claiming a hot tub orgy took place one year. As a US two-time gold medalist said: “I’ve seen people having sex right out in the open. On the grass, between buildings, people are getting down and dirty.”

In the mood to get down and dirty? Let the XXX games begin!

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About Madge

Fluent in innuendo. Certified in orgasms. Madge writes like she talks: directly, confidently, and with a wink you can practically hear. With years in the field and a professional's eye for what actually works (and what's just noise), she covers everything from the art of a great tease to the mechanics of phone sex done right. She's dominant by nature and educational by trade, which means she'll tell you exactly what to do and exactly why it works. Equal parts wicked and wise, Madge leaves the fluffing to someone else. She delivers results. What she writes about: Flirt of the Week features (she's got an eye for talent) Take Care of Yourself Tuesdays (self-care, her way, non-negotiable) The real mechanics of great phone sex Confidence, control, and knowing exactly what you're doing What your Zodiac sign says about your bedroom style (yes, even Scorpios get fact-checked.) Fun facts: Alphabetizes her bookshelf by author, then by how much she'd trust that author in bed. Takes her coffee the way she takes control: no sugar, no hesitation. Has cleared a pool table before her opponent got a single shot, and made it look like she was barely trying. Can bend over backwards. Won’t. The neighborhood cat still avoids eye contact (she knows why.)

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