Phone Sex

My name is Veronica. I hold a C-Suite position for a smaller company in Austin. Very few people understand what my actual title means, so I usually just say that my job is to help guide the company’s strategic financial decisions.

I am that rare person who likes working in an office. I am very professional and I love the thought of the structure and order of a truly on-point office. I work for a newer tech company though, so I see sweatpants and flip-flops a lot and am often frustrated at the way people think deadlines are suggestions and that it’s acceptable to to call me ‘dude’. When I close my eyes, I dream of a time where I am able to wear women’s tailored suits (especially one that is blood red) to work and not have someone get nacho cheese on my jacket or have the CEO give me a hard time for being over-dressed.

As I’ve grown older—I’m 29 now and turning 30 soon—I’ve begun to realize the value of being starkly honest with people. The way I phrase it is that I prioritize dealing with reality on reality’s terms. I was on a date a few months ago that it would have been an understatement to call a train wreck. After a few minutes of incredibly loud music and then a few more minutes of me debating the matter, I told the guy, “I’m having a terrible time here. If you’d like to go somewhere else, I’m open to it, but I can’t tolerate this anymore.” He hemmed and hawed for a bit and ultimately said nothing, so I left. It felt incredibly empowering and good to walk out of that bar.

About a month ago, I was hooking up with a guy and I don’t think Google maps would have helped him find the spot he was looking for. Historically, I’d just chuckle at his ineptitude and try to get through the experience as fast as possible. I felt different this evening though, so I told him, in no uncertain terms, what he needed to do and how much pressure needed to be applied. In the movie version of this, he’d have taken these instructions and run with them. However, in real life, he just began making different mistakes. I grabbed his head, told him that I needed to take control and instructed him to get on his back so I could ride his face. *That* worked beautifully.

When most people talk about the dichotomy between being in control and letting things happen, it’s a more global thing. In my experience, most people tend to separate those things by location; at work, I’m aggressive, at home I’m passive… or vice versa. I don’t. I have moments of assertiveness at work and in my personal life and I have moments where I yield in both as well. I have, however, noticed that the more laid back I am, the smoother my relationships tend to go, but as Neville Chamberlain found out in 1938, appeasement rarely works.

What brought me here was the desire to be able to safely tap into that desire to be more assertive from the comfort of my own home. It’s a side of myself that I want to get in touch with more often. I like having agency and want to indulge in that. In my professional life, balancing the needs of the whole team and acting as a representative for the company often butt heads. In my personal life, I don’t have the same qualms.

I am open to a lot of things (as long as they follow the terms of service) and am excited to create something with you that meets both of our respective needs!