{"id":34324,"date":"2018-02-06T08:15:54","date_gmt":"2018-02-06T16:15:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/?p=34324"},"modified":"2018-01-25T16:50:23","modified_gmt":"2018-01-26T00:50:23","slug":"7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Sex Posts That Are So Inappropriate You’ll Spit-Laugh"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Screen<\/a>You ever see a post so funny<\/a> that you actually spit your drink out? Well, we’ve got some good ones for you. Just make sure your laptop is appropriately protected!<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. \u201cBad things to say when you nut: whoopsie-doo, here comes the goo.\u201d<\/b> Or: a shot of goo from me to you!<\/li>\n
  2. \u201c‘Do you moan or cuss?’<\/b>‘Depends how good the food is but usually both.’\u201d<\/b> Food porn!<\/li>\n
  3. \u201cWhy is Santa’s sack so big? Because he only comes once a year.\u201d<\/b> Ooh, Santa baby!<\/li>\n
  4. \u201cI got birth control so I can stop being my boyfriend’s Toaster Strudel and start being his Twinkie.\u201d<\/b> Both are delicious!<\/li>\n
  5. \u201cIt’s kinda funny how when you get older you start to enjoy the things you hated as a kid like taking naps and getting spanked.\u201d<\/b> The second one was kind of unexpected, but no one is disagreeing.<\/li>\n
  6. \u201c‘Is having a penis fun?’<\/b>‘It has its ups and downs.’<\/b>”Sometimes it’s a little hard.’<\/b>‘It’s a pain in the ass.’\u201d<\/b> Come on, guys!<\/li>\n
  7. “Blowing a dandelion is basically you helping a weed ejaculate.”<\/b> Is that why it’s so joyful?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Looking for something risque? We can make you spit your drink out right on NiteFlirt<\/a>!<\/p>\n

    Check out more inappropriate sex jokes: https:\/\/www.buzzfeed.com\/andyneuenschwander\/17-posts-that-are-both-hilarious-and-totall<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    You ever see a post so funny that you actually spit your drink out? Well, we’ve got some good ones for you. Just make sure your laptop is appropriately protected! \u201cBad things to say when you nut: whoopsie-doo, here comes the goo.\u201d Or: a shot of goo from me to you! \u201c‘Do you moan or […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12633,11972],"tags":[9263,10437,12693,12692,301,12241],"class_list":["post-34324","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lists","category-lol","tag-buzzfeed","tag-funny","tag-moan","tag-post","tag-sex","tag-sex-jokes"],"yoast_head":"\n7 Sex Posts That Are So Inappropriate You'll Spit-Laugh - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"7 Sex Posts That Are So Inappropriate You'll Spit-Laugh - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"You ever see a post so funny that you actually spit your drink out? Well, we’ve got some good ones for you. Just make sure your laptop is appropriately protected! \u201cBad things to say when you nut: whoopsie-doo, here comes the goo.\u201d Or: a shot of goo from me to you! \u201c‘Do you moan or […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2018-02-06T16:15:54+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/Screen-Shot-2015-07-08-at-3.23.26-PM.png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"NiteFlirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@niteflirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@niteflirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"NiteFlirt\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"NiteFlirt\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc\"},\"headline\":\"7 Sex Posts That Are So Inappropriate You’ll Spit-Laugh\",\"datePublished\":\"2018-02-06T16:15:54+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":225,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2015\\\/06\\\/Screen-Shot-2015-07-08-at-3.23.26-PM.png\",\"keywords\":[\"Buzzfeed\",\"Funny\",\"moan\",\"post\",\"sex\",\"Sex Jokes\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Lists\",\"LOL!\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/7-sex-posts-that-are-so-inappropriate-youll-spit-laugh\\\/\",\"name\":\"7 Sex Posts That Are So Inappropriate You'll Spit-Laugh - 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