{"id":33642,"date":"2017-10-01T08:00:42","date_gmt":"2017-10-01T15:00:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/?p=33642"},"modified":"2017-09-29T09:55:45","modified_gmt":"2017-09-29T16:55:45","slug":"9-hilarious-sex-jokes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/","title":{"rendered":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"http---distractify-media-prod.cdn.bingo-2034374-980x\"<\/a>People on the internet are hilarious\u2014especially when it comes to cracking sex jokes. Take, for example, this apt comparison between sex and laundry detergent: 4 pumps = 1 load. Here are other hilarious sex jokes, courtesy of the internet!<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. \u201cCake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake.\u201d<\/b>
    \nLet them eat cake\u2014off your naked body! Or better yet, splosh with it!<\/li>\n
  2. \u201cSex is a lot like Mario Kart: you go really fast, you throw some bananas, Wario is there.\u201d <\/b>
    \nDescribes it perfectly!<\/li>\n
  3. \u201cSex is like pizza, if you’re going to use bbq sauce you better know what the fuck you’re doing.\u201d<\/b>
    \nIt’s funny ’cause it’s true!<\/li>\n
  4. \u201cI got birth control so I can stop being my boyfriend’s Toaster Strudel and start being his Twinkie.\u201d<\/b>
    \nMmm, delicious!<\/li>\n
  5. \u201c*in the middle of sex
    \n“Go deeper”
    \nOkay
    \n*pulls out*
    \n*sits in a chair and sips coffee*
    \n*opens poetry book*
    \nTwo roads diverged in a wood and I-\u201d <\/b>
    \nThere’s deeper and then there’s deeper<\/i>.<\/li>\n
  6. \u201cBoy do I love sex. Really love putting my penis into some *looks at smudged writing on hand* verguba.\u201d<\/b>
    \nPractice makes perfect!<\/li>\n
  7. \u201cMe: Netflix & chill?
    \nHer: sure
    \n[later that night]
    \nHer: so you don’t have Netflix?
    \nMe [pulling out 20 condoms]: I don’t have chill either\u201d <\/b>
    \nThe truth will set you free\u2014and get you laid!<\/li>\n
  8. \u201c*has sex with you*
    \n*declines your FB friend request*\u201d<\/b>
    \nKeeping it casual!<\/li>\n
  9. \u201cwhen two country music stars have sex they morph into a ford f-150.\u201d<\/b>
    \nExciting!<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Looking for some quality entertainment yourself? There’s only one thing better than a good laugh\u2014check out NiteFlirt<\/a> to get the punchline!<\/p>\n

    Here’s more of the best sex jokes on the internet: https:\/\/www.buzzfeed.com\/kevinsmith\/about-8-inches-makes-june-5th-wettest-in-history<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    People on the internet are hilarious\u2014especially when it comes to cracking sex jokes. Take, for example, this apt comparison between sex and laundry detergent: 4 pumps = 1 load. Here are other hilarious sex jokes, courtesy of the internet! \u201cCake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake.\u201d Let […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12250],"tags":[10669,12459,12241],"class_list":["post-33642","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-oh-myyy","tag-jokes","tag-list","tag-sex-jokes"],"yoast_head":"\n9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"People on the internet are hilarious\u2014especially when it comes to cracking sex jokes. Take, for example, this apt comparison between sex and laundry detergent: 4 pumps = 1 load. Here are other hilarious sex jokes, courtesy of the internet! \u201cCake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake.\u201d Let […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"NiteFlirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@niteflirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@niteflirt\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"NiteFlirt\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"NiteFlirt\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc\"},\"headline\":\"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":301,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2015\\\/11\\\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"Jokes\",\"list\",\"Sex Jokes\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Oh myyy\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/\",\"name\":\"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2015\\\/11\\\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2015\\\/11\\\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2015\\\/11\\\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg\",\"width\":750,\"height\":562},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/\",\"name\":\"NiteFlirt Blog\",\"description\":\"NiteFlirt -- Speak to your Desire. \u00ae\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc\",\"name\":\"NiteFlirt\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.niteflirt.com\\\/news\\\/author\\\/jenn\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets","og_description":"People on the internet are hilarious\u2014especially when it comes to cracking sex jokes. Take, for example, this apt comparison between sex and laundry detergent: 4 pumps = 1 load. Here are other hilarious sex jokes, courtesy of the internet! \u201cCake is better than sex because I can remember the last time I had cake.\u201d Let […]","og_url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/","og_site_name":"NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets","article_published_time":"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg","type":"","width":"","height":""}],"author":"NiteFlirt","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@niteflirt","twitter_site":"@niteflirt","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"NiteFlirt","Est. reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/"},"author":{"name":"NiteFlirt","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/#\/schema\/person\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc"},"headline":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes","datePublished":"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/"},"wordCount":301,"commentCount":0,"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg","keywords":["Jokes","list","Sex Jokes"],"articleSection":["Oh myyy"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/","url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/","name":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes - NiteFlirt News | Flirty Tips, Steamy Stories & Chat Secrets","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg","datePublished":"2017-10-01T15:00:42+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/#\/schema\/person\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/http-distractify-media-prod.cdn_.bingo-2034374-980x.jpg","width":750,"height":562},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/9-hilarious-sex-jokes\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"9 Hilarious Sex Jokes"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/","name":"NiteFlirt Blog","description":"NiteFlirt -- Speak to your Desire. \u00ae","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/#\/schema\/person\/509f1893fd23ba2833c2dab22882cddc","name":"NiteFlirt","url":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/author\/jenn\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33642","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33642"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33642\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":33754,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33642\/revisions\/33754"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33642"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33642"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.niteflirt.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33642"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}