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First things first: If you had a CLUE, you wouldnt be here. So when you CALL ME be prepared to shut your pathetic trap and heed my advice. BEGGARS can't be choosers, especially when they're pathetic sissy bitch FUCKTARDS incapable of INTROSPECTION (and NO, sitting in front of the television set dreadlocking the pubic hairs on your flaccid dick does not qualify as "introspection".) Your're the typical middle american working stiff that looks to everything but the MIRROR for the answers to his problems. You will NOW rely on YOUR MERCILESS MISTRESS and her TAROT INSIGHT to put you in your place. I'm not some pathologically pathetic "Pollyanna" that will feed your feeble ego with platitudes and positive self talk (BARF). ..... It's not the size of your dick asshole... IT"S YOU!

Your tarot reading with me will provide you with lots of "insight" by telling you shit that you already KNOW about but choose to deny because you're a pussy boy! Get some LUBE for your reading because you'll have your finger in your asshole the ENTIRE TIME! HAHAHAHHA! Unlike most readers (that suck) I'll give you advice relevant to your everyday challenges like your stupidity, small dick, laziness, cuckold wife, lousy sex-life, pathetic sexual performance, wife that cant' suck dick to save her life, self-induced boredom, inability to get laid, poor hygiene, and other issues SPECIFIC TO THE PATHETIC DOUCHEBAG BETA MALE CONDITION.

For the record, I couldn't give a FUCK about being "objective" and taking your feelings, world view, or values into consideration. Get a life you pathetic bitch loser. My way is THE RIGHT OF WAY. What I say GOES. I REFUSE TO CODDLE your pansy sissy boy ass. So put your Sissy Boy Undies on and call me. Be prepared to spend at LEAST twenty minutes on the phone being humiliated like a douche bag while I translate the message of the tarot to your challenges. If you piss me off I'll have you screaming my name with your FINGER UP YOUR ASS the entire time.You're going to pay me (and my TAROT DECK) to tell it LIKE IT IS! I'm not your pathetic wife or girlfriend LOSER. I'm a self-absorbed, money hungry BITCH. Call me now SUCKER!!