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Come Here Piggy Piggy..... NOW BITCH !!!!

I am in need of a good little piggy bank. NO questions asked... all you need is the knowledge that you are here to make MY LIFE EASIER !!! I want you to provide me with all the comforts that I DESERVE AND EXPECT !!! Shopping trips, spa treatments, bills paid and whatever else I desire... you know why you are here !!! Do not make me ignore you... You wouldn't like what happens then !!!