Phone Sex

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Yummy Honey

Tried SURREAL SILLY SEX? Monty Python Style? ;-)

Why take phonesex so seriously? It can be fun, it can be playful, it can be silly and ridiculous, and even a (Bonus points if you get this reference.)

Have you tried to put a little surreality into your average ho-hum sexual fanatasies?

It may sound strange at first, but after a while you will find it addictive.

Don't understand what this entails? Well...

My wheelbarrow is filled with several different specimens of Irish stewing leeks. All of them are named Earl. Except for one. And it calls onto you, beckoningly, achingly. The Leek-Who-Is-Not-Earl demands you come hither and receive the token it has to bestow upon you. Are you prepared for what lies in store for you? I see your soup quivering. Your soup quivers mightily in ways that make my nipples stand on-to. It is all I can do to not run screaming, while donning an argyle sock on my left ear and a spatula in my nostril, towards you in complete and total abandon. Straight into your awaiting lederhosen, beyond the land of moldy cheese. Together, we shall erect a monument to the Goddess of Really Shiny Things, and we shall be content.

"Come to me!" cries the clogdancing bellybutton parade. "Come to me so that I may know the splendor of your sweet, abiding casava melon of passion!" Stuff me full of your salty knockwurst surprise and make me scream out the name of Wink Martindale with careless abandon! ...and lo, how I tremble, my sweet, to know, that once, and only once, you are not only mine, but you are soggy.

Are you scared?

Curious for more?

Masochistic enough to endure this? I can make your brain hurt so good.

Give me a call. Whether you find this erotic, hilarious, or just plain scary. It is damned fine entertainment and a pretty good mental workout, whether you choose to join in, or just listen to my patent brand of insanity. The level of improvisational randomness that spews forth from my mouth will astound and frighten. At the very least, I'm sure this will be a session you will never forget. ;-)

P.S. - My "spicier" pics, vids, yahoo ID, and my other listings can be found here.

Also, unlike most other NF girls, I am a real girl and respond to mail thoughtfully and candidly. Just be gentlemanly in your mail, and you'll get a sincere and often speedy response from me, to be sure! got questions about this crazy listing? Just ask!