YOU:
Provide the boner.

ME:
Offer JOI* and CEI** backed by over 20 years of phone sex expertise..

WE:
Work together toward a satisfying competition*** of today's masturbation endeavor.

* JOI. aka Jerk off instruction. aka I tell you exactly how to stroke your hard cock and you obey my instructions. 

** CEI = Come (or cum) eating instructions. Optional but encouraged. As in I will encourage you to lick up your creamy gooey semen. I can't make you. And you can't erase the fact that you wanted by refusing the load after you spill it. 

*** Satisfying completion usually but not always includes you nutting super fucking hard for me.