Why hello there! Why are you looking at me like that? My eyes are up here you know? I bet you're imagining pulling me over your lap and thrashing my thick yams while I whimper and beg you for mercy. Or perhaps you're looking to go over my lap, with my hand destroying your ass and dignity. Making you beg me for mercy and confessing to me every wrong-doing, every decision that led to you going over my knee. Whoever's ass is getting destroyed, why not just pick up the phone and call me?