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Your male inadequacies REVEALED

The reasons I am superior to you are abundant. Aside from the obvious deformity between your legs, I will go into extreme detail about all of your inadequacies, such as your failing marriage, dead end job, and worthless life. We can discuss humiliating experiences from your past and how those experiences made you the freak you are today. Goddess is all knowing. My infinite wisdom is sure to shed some light on your dark, twisted soul. In addition to this enlightenment, I will elaborate on all the parts of me that are perfect (SPOILER ALERT: everything about me is perfect). From my beautiful eyes to my wiggly toes, I am the full package. I think it's time for you to make that call.