Phone Sex

: Looking for the best phone sex? You've found it, here at NiteFlirt.

So Niteflirt wants me to be sure I describe:

"the specialties that you offer"

I don't offer specialities. I am not a restaurant.

"your experience and background"

Yeah, I have some of both.

"the reasons why someone should pay you for your services"

You shouldn't pay for my services, because I do not offer services.

But you should call me anyway.

Want to know why?

Because I'm really fucking interesting, and whatever happens, it will be memorable.

Oh wait, I do offer a service- bedtime stories. I read bedtime stories.

AND I will happily make fun of your perverted ass if you consent to it. Men are like monkeys with their chronic masturbation and I enjoy telling them what I really, genuinely think of it.